Current mood:	impressed
Current music:	Jillian Ann

JillianAnn.com, the "mmm" in my meta-blog today.
So, the night before last, at about 3 am, I stumbled across JillianAnn.com during a random bout of insomniacal surfing. And the first thing that I noticed was that Jillian Ann was cute. I mean really, look at this:



Turns out, she's actually a professional model.

So, given this discovery, I promptly did what most male surfers do when they come across a cute female model's website. I clicked about searching for nudity.

Finding none, I was forced to read.

But I didn't really feel like reading, so I mostly just clicked about in random fashion.

And I discovered a link to a page full of videos of Jillian Ann. And I figured that'd be a promising place to find nudity, so I clicked around. And didn't find nudity. Not even in the video in which Jillian Ann reviews books while bath-tubbing. There is a little bit of butt cheek in a post-Parisian-fetish-party catwalk clip, but it's not Jillian Ann's. (By the way, if you watch that clip, and you're thinking that they're talking about a feminine hygiene product, go ask somebody who speaks French to help you understand what's going on. It's clean. Cleanly, even.)

So I didn't find any nudity to speak of.

But I did find good humor. Not just in the "Ah, that's funny" sense, but also in the cozy warmth of the online persona Jillian Ann projects. See, I'm the sort of person who likes good youth hostels. I like the vibe you get when you put a bunch of twentysomethings in a foreign land, wander them about all day through museums and landscapes and cobblestone alleys, and then gather them up at night in a grungy communal living space, where stories are shared and makeup is shed. People are themselves when they travel. Or they're who they'd wish themselves to be. And they drink too much and stay up too late and wake up too early because the hostel makes them (but usually too late for breakfast) and the world becomes this slightly groggy series of explorations and revelations and conversations with complete strangers who feel like they've always been friends. That's the way I travel, anyway.

And that's the way Jillian Ann's videos felt to me, at 3am the night before last. Like she stayed up too late, woke up too early, had a bunch of experiences and conversations -- some cool, some ordinary, some both or neither -- and she invited us to watch. And if she was cool or funny, that's just because that's the way she is, even when (especially when?) she's groggy or engrogged and she's not wearing any makeup.

So, last night, at about 1am, I took another peak at her website and realized that it had both a Flash and an HTML version. That's the sort of thing you tend to miss at 3am, so all you youngsters out there should stay in school, eat your vegetables, stay off the smack, and surf early. Anyway, if you click to see the Flash version, there's actually a millisecond or two where you see a teaser pic of Jillian Ann wearing a sheer green top. And the same pic (or at least the same top) occasionally flashes on the main Flash site, and I think that's just brilliant. I mean, the Flash version of the site flashed me! It kind of makes you want to just reach out and hug her, except that, if she's only wearing a transparent green top, she might not really feel that comfortable if you suddenly reached out at her from a computer screen. A bit too "A Nightmare on Elm Street" meets Ahnold.

Anyway, you can also find static sheer green top pics here and there about the flash version of the site. So, yeah, bosoms.

Well, "so, yeah, bosoms" might not do it justice. At 1am, my view of the view was more like "Yay! Sweet bosoms!" But, you know, "so, yeah, bosoms" sounds similar enough without being as, well, pathetic-webgawker-seeming.

Anyway, my quest for nudity having been at least partially rewarded, I thought I'd celebrate by reading more of Jillian Ann's stuff instead of just gawking at it. But first I gawked a bit, just to be safe. Like Heinlein said, "gawk first, grok later." Actually, I doubt he said that. I just came up with it, though, and think it was worth typing, carpal tunnel be damned, because you know it's how we really are. (Actually, no we're not. It's really just you, you pathetic webgawker.)

So, back to the reading bit. By which I mean my description of my reading. You haven't stopped reading, silly. Keep up.

Jillian Ann's text is as naked and as sheerly courageous as those bosom pics. It's pretty clear that this is a girl who's been through some not so very lovely things, the sort of things that would (and do) make a lot of other people pretty bitter instead of pretty. Eating disorders. Sexual assault. The nasty things that people with power do to people without. And instead of cowering in a closet and becoming a covered, broken shard of her former self, she writes about it. Sharing her experiences so that others can help get through their own. She links to an awful lot of resources, and I get the sense that she may have built some of them herself. And that's just awesome. And she doesn't just have resources for victims. She also has links for aspiring models, musicians and vegans (as she is, herself, a model, musician, and vegan). And that's just so cool.

Well, maybe not the vegan part. I mean, I'm not advocating the slaughter of little fuzzy critters or anything. 'cept Ewoks. But I'm firmly on the Kate & Leopold side of rich, creamery butter. Life is composed of tastes, and life is less tasty if you can't add milk or eggs to your chocolate. Do treat your heifers and hens with respect, though.

Anyway, back to Jillian Ann. I like her site, and you should check it out. And buy her cd or something if you're into the way she sings. (Not quite my style, though I respect what she's doing.)

And Jillian Ann, if you happen to read this, then this bit of meta-blog's for you. You inspired it all by yourself, so I guess that means you've graduated from artist to muse. Go celebrate!

I suggest more nudity. ;)